Age: 22

 

Hometown: Lawrence, MA

 

College: Dartmouth, 2014

 

Major: History

 

Dream: I have a passion for education, working for my community, design, and creativity. 

 

Ask her about: Spanish, education, design, mental health 

"ALWAYS BET ON YOURSELF. IT'S GONNA BE DONE, GONNA BE ACCOMPLISHED IF YOU HAVE FAITH. IT'S NOT GOING TO TURN OUT AS YOU EXPECT, (NOTHING EVER DOES), BUT IT'S GONNA TURN OUT AS IT SUPPOSED TO."

Were there any special circumstances why your parents did not go to college?

I guess for my parents it was an economic issue. For my mother, her family was having difficulties in the DR so they had to migrate to find work. By the time she was 24, she was already working and came over to the US. She doesn't speak the language here, so she's always gone from one job to another. She doesn't speak the language at all. On my father's side. I wasn't raised by him whatsoever. He attended college (engineer) but he dropped out.

 

 

Did you always plan on going to college?

Yeah. I've always planned to go to college, because I knew so many people who hadn't. It had always had been my mother's plan. She felt uprooted from her country, and she always had a purpose to it. All her kids would go to college. We would not have to live from paycheck to paycheck.

I live in an immigrant community, so a lot of people don't speak English. When you have so many expectations. A lot of people I know have to work more than 40 hours, there isn't much time to learn another language.

 

What was your personal reason for going to college? Has this changed since being in college?

I guess I've always from a young age was really immersed in academics. I didn't speak English when I first came into school, and I was in these special classes for individual attention. I was more secluded from other kids my age, and found comfort in reading. I ended up reading a lot, picture books and watching tv. Tv was one of my biggest educators. Reading becomes a habit and you start becoming really passionate about it. I was really drawn to it. By the time I was in high school, I realized college was my way of getting out into the world. I didn't want to be limited by a world where I had to live paycheck to paycheck. There is less of a support system. WE had friends who had to worry about paying their own bills.

 

What is your job? Do you have a dream job?

I don't have a dream job yet. I think when I was in high school I dreamed about being a lawyer. When you don't have many professional role models to look to, things are limited. College has opened a lot of doors and opportunities. College did the opposite for me than it does for most. Before, I was limited in my decisions because of few role models. Once I went into college so many opportunities opened up. And found there are so many ways your passions can lead you. Startup people are so passionate. I'm amazed at what you can venture into. I'm exploring and still trying to figure it out. I have a passion for education and a passion for workng for my community, and design and creativity.

 

What will be the biggest benefit of your college degree in your personal and professional lives?

Definitely my social network. I don't think, "social network" in a way of advancing career. But I've been able to meet people to support me intellectually, emotionally, physically and virtually. When you are in a low-socioeconomic group resources and other things are prioritized. There's more priority thinking about securing food and having a roof over head. Most parents don't have the time for extra emotional support. Going into college and meeting people with so many backgrounds, getting challenged and prepared for what you're going to get exposed to--- there is more of an emphasis on this emotional support.

 

 

Who did you go to for college application advice?

I applied to college completely wrong. I didn't consult a lot of people. I tried the guidance counselor thing. She wasn't very helpful. She really pushed me to apply to schools that everybody  else had gone to. Local community colleges and colleges in 15 minute radius. I had people tell me I wouldn't get into any colleges I had applied to. My mentor was really encouraging, but I don't think he understood my background because he was white and an engineer. I took a class at the YMCA to help me navigate, but it wasn't very helpful either. Someone came and picked me up to bring me to Dartmouth.

 

Who are the biggest influences on you in your life?

I think one of my biggest influences is my grandmother. Because she is the matriach of our family. She is very strong. It wasn't until many years later I realized all the difficulties she had to overcome. I think sometimes like when I went to Dartmouth or when I meet other people who are in college that I realize we all come from such a place of privilege. I used to think I didn't come from privilege until I heard my grandmother's stories. She didn't have enough food to eat after the war. She was afraid of water because she was going to drown. I think she is probably my biggest role model. Just how strong she could be in so many ways.

Also my mother. it's funny because as a first gen student, people think “wow this is so amazing you surpassed all odds.” But It was her expectation I would go to college and she never thought less. She had very high expectations for me, Wow she does have high expecations for me I think that's very different from people who set the bar low for you.

 

How much do you feel being a first gen has shaped your college experience? Has it created any added difficulties or challenges?

I think definitely In my identity a lot of intersectionality. I am not only a first gen, but I am also a Latina and low-socioeconomic student. That's kind of like three labels that are difficult to navigate while at a prestigious white institution. For the first 3 years, it was probably the hardest 3 years of my life. Because there's not a lot of people you can identity with. People seemed “stuck up” and always trying to represent themselves in a particular way whether in greek societies or toting longchamp bags. I wasn't used to it whatsoever. I didn't tell people my parents didn't speak Englsih because I would get a lot of weird looks. So I had to keep a large part of my personality “hidden” and it was hard to become engaged in campus life because you were just hiding who you were. I think it is hard with everything as a first gen. Academically it was really difficult, I didn't have a high school that necessarily prepared me for stuff in college. I didn't have the confidence. I think it made a world of a difference because I didn't have the confidence. It took me 2 years to realize that it didn’t matter what anyone thought of me. The last two years I just rolled my eyes thinking of me worrying about that stuff, like that was dumb.

 

What was your biggest struggle in college? Before college?

I think my mental health. At Dartmouth it went by 3 term year vs. a semester. Everything was much quicker than most colleges, it's so much harder to catch up with classes if you fall behind. And everybody, to this day a lot of people just carry a facade. Everybody is just cheery all the d*mn time for no d*mn reason, its really hard if you have a difficult situation at home or if you aren't doing well in class or if its just really f*cking cold. All that and being exposed to so much it felt like a cultural shock. I felt like my mental health was declining. People didn't know or believe or listen if I told them why. Eventually, I did find really great people and really great mentors that I could talk to. Not just about academics but also personal life. Counseling really helped. Mental health is a really big problem for a lot of people. And no one talks about it. There’s so much pressure all the time to excel.

 

What advice about going to college, furthering education, or chasing dreams would you give an aspiring first gen-  in middle school or high school?

I think just to always bet on yourself. Always have the confidence that you're going to get there. Things are going to fall into place. We spend so much time thinking about "falling" or that people are gonna tell you your'e not going to do it, just from your backgound or being labeled as first gen. Always bet on yourself. It's gonna be done, gonna be accomplished if you have faith. It's not going to turn out as you expect, (nothing ever does), but its gonna turn out as it supposed to be.

 

What does your education mean to you?

A huge accomplishment but also a huge burden. I mean a huge accomplishment because its something no one in my family has ever done before. A burden because it complicates a lot once you graduate college. You are exposed to college and you question who you are and who you want to be and how you want to fit into your community. It's hard to find your place and where you fit in. I think it's great and opens a lot of doors, and gives me a lot of credibilty, when I mention Dartmouth, a lot of people perk up and their response changes. I think a lot of people are passive and when you mention Dartmouth people go like, "Oh you're smart". I think it's a little hard to explain it. I think like it's a double-edged sword. It's great and I would never take it back, but there is a lot of burden after. 

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